Day 425: I’m alive …
I’m still alive, I just haven’t blogged in over two weeks because I got hit with a combination of sickness (several things after another) and busyness (some marketing commitments I had made).
After my last blog post, I got laid low by a headache that lasted a couple days. It wasn’t quite as bad as a migraine but it was still too painful for me to work.
I started feeling better on the following Tuesday, but I was a bit stressed by some Facebook marketing commitments I had to do that week, and of course my IBS acted up because of the stress. So I decided to take that week off from writing, at least until the marketing stuff was over, and instead do some writing-related work such as setting up blog posts and writing my newsletters for the next two months.
It took me a lot longer than I had expected to get all that marketing stuff done, but I’m glad I wasn’t writing because the IBS was distracting me during the day.
I know some writers who write with stuff like fibromyalgia and other chronic illnesses, and I don’t know how they do it. The discomfort intermittently breaks my concentration, so it’s hard to fully focus.
Early this week, I was going to start work again, but then I had (womanly issues), and I typically take off sick for a few days because my symptoms are usually very bad. I didn’t even try to write, and instead I did non-writing home stuff. Tidying my office stuff made me feel a bit mentally refreshed.
Today, I’m still not feeling great but I want to try to get some work done, even though tomorrow is my writing Sabbath. Maybe BECAUSE tomorrow is my writing Sabbath, I want to get at least something done on my book this week. I’m going to continue with my blocking of book 4.
I’m frustrated with myself that I haven’t been able to keep on track with my writing. I feel like I’m simply making excuses and I should just push through no matter how I’m feeling. However, I know this is irrational and I wouldn’t get anything done if I tried to work while suffering through a headache.
I know logically that (most of the time) when I’m sick, I’m actually sick and can’t work. I admit there have been several times I was simply lazy, but I forced myself to record that here on my blog, which also served to help me snap out of it relatively quickly. (This blog has been really motivating for me—When I’m working and feeling lazy and I’m tempted to stop work for the day, I realize I will have to confess on my blog that I only did 90 minutes of writing, and that forces me to put in more hours.)
I also know logically that trying to write when I’m stressed usually doesn’t work out well, either. I usually don’t get much done. When I was working in biotech, I could totally work even though I was stressed because running an assay doesn’t involve my emotions. But writing requires more emotional energy, and I don’t have that when I’m stressed.
But even knowing these things logically doesn’t make me feel any less like a loser for not writing for 2 weeks. Even though I ended up getting a lot of writing-related work done, even though I got a lot of office tidying done, even though I read books to refill the creative well.
I need to let go of the popular piece of advice for writers to write (prose) every day. I know I need to let this go but it’s really hard not to feel guilty when I don’t write. I’ve been learning that with my personality and the way my brain is wired, I work best when I divide a book writing process into phases, and I go methodically through each phase. The writing part is only one phase. But does knowing myself make me feel less pathetic? Nope.
But I guess writing all that out today has helped me to remember that even if I’m not writing, I’m still working. I may have to work around my sicknesses and my stress levels, but I’m still managing to get stuff done.
***
I was fighting a low-grade headache but managed to get about 4 hours of work done on my book. I took a break for dinner.
While I ate, I started thinking that maybe I need to devote more energy to developing more discipline in going to bed on time and getting up at the same time everyday. I always have good intentions, but I don’t actually put that much effort into enforcing them.
I wasn’t like this when I was in my 20s, but as I get older, I’m finding that I respond better to more detailed scheduling, and it has been making me more efficient during my day. So I wondered if maybe I should take that one step further and become stricter in my waking and sleeping hours. I think that a stricter schedule might help me to be able to focus better. I’m not sure if that’s true, but since I’ve never really tried it, I think I should experiment and see if that works.
I’m going to try to start doing that this weekend and try to get on a schedule so that I can hopefully start on time on Monday morning.
***
I got a couple more hours of work done after dinner, and I feel pretty satisfied with what I got done today—I finished blocking the scene I left off last time, completed another scene, and I’m halfway through a third scene. I’m estimating that I have another 15-20 hours of blocking left to do, if this follows the same pattern as books 2 and 3. If I can keep working at it, I can finish blocking next week and start writing!
Outlining: time spent: 0
Blocking: time spent: 6 hours, 10 minutes
Editing: Time spent: 0
Writing: Time spent: 0
Writing: Total number of words: n/a
Writing: Overall writing speed: n/a
Time spent doing other writing-related business: 1 hour, 8 minutes
My takeaway for today: I have to remind myself that even if I’m not writing, I’m still working. I may have to work around my sicknesses and my stress levels, but I’m still managing to get stuff done.
My second takeaway for today: Put in more effort to get on a stricter waking/sleeping schedule to see if that improves productivity.
After my last blog post, I got laid low by a headache that lasted a couple days. It wasn’t quite as bad as a migraine but it was still too painful for me to work.
I started feeling better on the following Tuesday, but I was a bit stressed by some Facebook marketing commitments I had to do that week, and of course my IBS acted up because of the stress. So I decided to take that week off from writing, at least until the marketing stuff was over, and instead do some writing-related work such as setting up blog posts and writing my newsletters for the next two months.
It took me a lot longer than I had expected to get all that marketing stuff done, but I’m glad I wasn’t writing because the IBS was distracting me during the day.
I know some writers who write with stuff like fibromyalgia and other chronic illnesses, and I don’t know how they do it. The discomfort intermittently breaks my concentration, so it’s hard to fully focus.
Early this week, I was going to start work again, but then I had (womanly issues), and I typically take off sick for a few days because my symptoms are usually very bad. I didn’t even try to write, and instead I did non-writing home stuff. Tidying my office stuff made me feel a bit mentally refreshed.
Today, I’m still not feeling great but I want to try to get some work done, even though tomorrow is my writing Sabbath. Maybe BECAUSE tomorrow is my writing Sabbath, I want to get at least something done on my book this week. I’m going to continue with my blocking of book 4.
I’m frustrated with myself that I haven’t been able to keep on track with my writing. I feel like I’m simply making excuses and I should just push through no matter how I’m feeling. However, I know this is irrational and I wouldn’t get anything done if I tried to work while suffering through a headache.
I know logically that (most of the time) when I’m sick, I’m actually sick and can’t work. I admit there have been several times I was simply lazy, but I forced myself to record that here on my blog, which also served to help me snap out of it relatively quickly. (This blog has been really motivating for me—When I’m working and feeling lazy and I’m tempted to stop work for the day, I realize I will have to confess on my blog that I only did 90 minutes of writing, and that forces me to put in more hours.)
I also know logically that trying to write when I’m stressed usually doesn’t work out well, either. I usually don’t get much done. When I was working in biotech, I could totally work even though I was stressed because running an assay doesn’t involve my emotions. But writing requires more emotional energy, and I don’t have that when I’m stressed.
But even knowing these things logically doesn’t make me feel any less like a loser for not writing for 2 weeks. Even though I ended up getting a lot of writing-related work done, even though I got a lot of office tidying done, even though I read books to refill the creative well.
I need to let go of the popular piece of advice for writers to write (prose) every day. I know I need to let this go but it’s really hard not to feel guilty when I don’t write. I’ve been learning that with my personality and the way my brain is wired, I work best when I divide a book writing process into phases, and I go methodically through each phase. The writing part is only one phase. But does knowing myself make me feel less pathetic? Nope.
But I guess writing all that out today has helped me to remember that even if I’m not writing, I’m still working. I may have to work around my sicknesses and my stress levels, but I’m still managing to get stuff done.
***
I was fighting a low-grade headache but managed to get about 4 hours of work done on my book. I took a break for dinner.
While I ate, I started thinking that maybe I need to devote more energy to developing more discipline in going to bed on time and getting up at the same time everyday. I always have good intentions, but I don’t actually put that much effort into enforcing them.
I wasn’t like this when I was in my 20s, but as I get older, I’m finding that I respond better to more detailed scheduling, and it has been making me more efficient during my day. So I wondered if maybe I should take that one step further and become stricter in my waking and sleeping hours. I think that a stricter schedule might help me to be able to focus better. I’m not sure if that’s true, but since I’ve never really tried it, I think I should experiment and see if that works.
I’m going to try to start doing that this weekend and try to get on a schedule so that I can hopefully start on time on Monday morning.
***
I got a couple more hours of work done after dinner, and I feel pretty satisfied with what I got done today—I finished blocking the scene I left off last time, completed another scene, and I’m halfway through a third scene. I’m estimating that I have another 15-20 hours of blocking left to do, if this follows the same pattern as books 2 and 3. If I can keep working at it, I can finish blocking next week and start writing!
Outlining: time spent: 0
Blocking: time spent: 6 hours, 10 minutes
Editing: Time spent: 0
Writing: Time spent: 0
Writing: Total number of words: n/a
Writing: Overall writing speed: n/a
Time spent doing other writing-related business: 1 hour, 8 minutes
My takeaway for today: I have to remind myself that even if I’m not writing, I’m still working. I may have to work around my sicknesses and my stress levels, but I’m still managing to get stuff done.
My second takeaway for today: Put in more effort to get on a stricter waking/sleeping schedule to see if that improves productivity.
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